Attachment

During our first years of life, we form early attachment relationships that set the foundation for the rest of our lives. Attachment is at the very core of our beliefs, emotions, behaviors, relationships, and morality. If we were fortunate enough to have a loving, present, predictable, safe, and stable environment to grow up in, then we would come to expect that we can explore the world, feel safe, take chances, and expect the best from ourselves and others. But if our caregiver or caregivers had their own unresolved trauma, attachment wounds, or mental health and/or substance abuse issues, then they might have struggled to provide this sort of environment for their child to develop a healthy, secure attachment system.

Because of neurobiology research, we now know that it is possible to heal early attachment patterns and develop an “earned” secure attachment during the therapeutic process. This can lead us toward a sense of emotional safety, belonging, and connection to ourselves and others.

What helps develop secure attachment?

Each of these at least 25–30% or more of the time:

Safety and protection
Presence, responsiveness, and availability
Unflappable trust
Consistency and reliability
Emotional attunement
Reciprocity in communication
Welcoming, affectionate, and playful interactions
Sense of ease in coming and going

Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life's search for love and wisdom.

– Rumi

If you feel you are ready to journey deeply into your healing, to move beyond the beliefs and past experiences that are holding you back from living your best life, then my way of working may be what you are looking for. Request an initial consultation to discuss my approach and how we could work together.